bludger.org

This passes as news?

May 23rd, 2005 - 10:55pm

At work today, while I was on my lunch break, I was reading yesterday’s Sunday Herald Sun and was surprised at the quality of the “news” contained within.

Now we all know that the Herald Sun doesn’t exactly adhere to the highest standards around; they’re kind of like the channel 10 of pointless news. With this in mind, and the fact that it was a Sunday paper, I should’ve known better than to expect quality journalism.

What I got was two-hundred-and-seven pages dedicated to whiny pom Kylie Minogue and her cancer. Big deal, people get cancer every day, why’s it such a big deal when yet another famous old bag has it?

Next up was the article surrounding the ban of a little shit from playing club football. This took almost a whole page. If he calls the umpire a “dickhead”, as the article purports, then he gets everything he deserves.

A little further into the paper’s depths, and we had a smallish report on some yobbo family’s car being stolen (no linky for this article). The guy had bought and restored an XYGT Falcon (not this one) to near-mint condition, and now it was stolen. Well big bloody deal. Cars get stolen every day; yes, even nice ones. Get over it.

In the immortal words of Jeff Albertson Comic Book Guy, “Worst. Paper. Ever.”

Tags: boring, newspaper, stupid