One of most important things a guy can lose is his wallet. Without a wallet, a guy has no money, no access to money, no proof that he exists, and no padding should he get whacked in the back pocket.

It comes as a surprise to me, then, that I keep misplacing my wallet. Whenever I drive, I take my wallet out of my pocket; whenever I sit down at work, I put the wallet on my desk; whenever I sit anywhere else, I usually take out my wallet and put it close by.

But I keep leaving it in the car and leaving it on the desk at work. The other morning I found it wedged in between my car’s seat and the door. I’ve left it at work overnight a number of times; once, in fact, I had to convince a security guard I hadn’t seen before (I know most of them) that I did indeed work in this building and I needed to get into get my ID to prove to him that I worked there.

But I still keep losing it.